Instead of That Sexy Tattoo, Just Work Out!

You can polish a turd but it's still just a piece of shit.

Wow!  Was that harsh?!?  Good.

Tattoos can be very sexy and expressive, but only when the canvas isn't warped and bloated.  It won't matter that you have a tramp stamp when your back looks like a busted can of biscuits.  An ankle tattoo will only draw attention to the fact that you don't really have ankles.  Instead of spending money on a tattoo that won't enhance your sexy, invest in a gym membership.

I know... a tattoo isn't always about looking cute.  Sometimes it's about showing allegiance to a country or cause or honoring a living or dead loved one, but when you slap a tat over some hot mess you're not honoring anyone.

Make the tat your reward when you've dropped fifteen pounds and tightened up what's left.  You'll feel better about yourself-- and so will we.