Sunday, August 15, 2010
Strip Club Revelations
1. When a stripper gets to "jigglatin'", all her imperfections melt away.
2. The smell of sweaty weave is nauseating.
3. Men want love, but what they want even more is an ass bouncing off their chests to the rhythm of "Oh myyyyyyyyyy gosh..."
4. A cheap pair of stillettos can turn any woman into a goddess of love and sex and magic.
5. "No touching!!!"
6. After midnight, rubbing a stripper's ass is like enduring a clammy handshake from a stranger.
7. You can get punked into paying for a dance you didn't request.
8. Every wannabe wife should be required to take pole dancing/ stripper classes, but should only be trained in the "ghetto shaker club" style of performance -- to hell with that Carmen Electra shit.
9. Strippers keep their panties around one ankle so as to be able to find them after servicing us; there's a lesson in that.
10. Why is there no stripper's Hall of Fame?