"Would You Treat Your Mother the Way You Treat Me?"

She's one up on you... and always will be.

Of course not.  She carried me inside her for nine months.  You just did it for less than a half-hour.  Jokes aside, quit making comparisons between yourself and the mother of the man currently making your life a living hell.

We can go to our mothers for comfort when sad or hurt without wondering if she's thinking, "Man, he's acting like a bitch."

Our mothers crown us no matter how badly we do on any given day.  It may not be the best positive reinforcement, but is it something you'd do?

She can read us like a book, our mother, and she senses our moods and dispositions.  With you it's the other way... like you thought you were dating a swami.

Mothers don't judge us (to our faces).

Our mothers are the ones who made us, who birthed us, who helped us survive when we were completely helpless.  When others didn't know whether or not they loved us she did it unconditionally.  No matter what drastic life changes we make she's always in our corner, always willing to let us fly, to be ourselves.  We're not a project to them but their greatest achievement.

You're just the girl we've been smashing for the past __ months.  So... don't go there.