Do you believe there's such a thing as a soulmate?

Monday, April 26, 2010


Don Draper, lauded inventor of "Don't ask, don't tell."
Men don't lie as much as you think.  We omit.

It's actually a man's preferred method of deception (and sometimes self-deception).  A man will cheat on you and pretend it never happened.  Because it never happened there's nothing to remember.  And because there's nothing to remember there's nothing to betray us in words, actions and behaviors.

Women think of honesty both as telling the truth when asked and disclosing "pertinent" information; men don't consider the latter as such.  To offer unsolicited information seems to us wholly unnecessary.  Besides, we already think that anything we say can and will be used against us in a (divorce) court of law.

Women lie by omission as well-- big lies-- such as, "Of course the baby's yours."  We just assume that you keep weighty secrets from us as well, not because we feel guilty about our own but because you have a knack for exhorting us to confess everything while you confess nothing.

I'm all for omission, personally-- so long as no one's seriously wounded.  The older generations of women knew: don't ask, don't tell.  You may say it's why many of them went crazy within their quiet lives, but a lot of you are already bat-shit at twenty-something.  Omission is never malicious where relationships are concerned; in fact it may be necessary to keep things on a even keel.

So the next time you look into a man's eyes and see in them a question that needs answering, ask yourself instead if what you discover will improve your situation in the slightest.

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