On Doggystyle

"Take the wood, bitch!"

A long-circulated scientific theory posits that human females' breasts grew to their current size(s) to compensate for the buttocks pulling in as we began to walk upright (guess that explains why seeing a woman push them together is so hot).

That said, men still prefer a "rear view," especially during coitus.  Why, you ask?  Two reasons, mostly: 1) He can forget, at least for a little while, that you're a unique individual with a brain and feelings (sorry!) and 2) It hides anything sketchy going on with your tits or your gut, or that ungodly front-butt (sorry x 2!).

Women take personally the impersonality of doggystyle if it's a man's preferred position, as if watching you watching us make stupid O-faces while we bear down on you missionary-style is what constitutes lovemaking.  To be sure, some women have bad breath (real life).  Nothing humbles an erection like the smell of sinus drainage.

Going at it from behind also affords us a couple of luxuries.  We don't have to sell the ecstasy on our faces or else worry about you asking something dumb like "What's wrong?  Am I not turning you on?" (if he's inside you he's more than likely turned on); a blank stare can preside over this orgasm.  And if the TV's still on (please let there be a good movie on) then we get to engage in the kind of multitasking you're always demanding of us.