Do you believe there's such a thing as a soulmate?

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Why "Soft Landings" Don't Work

Relationship "experts"-- in their books, blogs, seminars, advice columns, and TV guest appearances-- have been letting you women off easy.

And you know it.

Women say they want the ugly truth but this is horse shit.  They want Truth Ultra-Lite, honesty buffered by so much hand-holding and reassuring that it isn't even taken seriously.

Dr. Phil comes to mind.  So does Steve Harvey.  Remember that these men are trying to sell books, and they figure they'll sell more if they cater to your egos while giving you the "soft landing."

I don't do soft landings.

The reason I started this blog was because of the looks I saw on women's faces when they asked me a question about men and I answered it-- bluntly and succinctly.  Some of them even said in that moment, "...that's kinda fucked up."  But they knew they could trust the answer.

Aside from Questions & Manswers, I keep a tight handle on how men express themselves on this blog.  Many of them carry their own peculiar hang-ups, disappointments and bitter resentments about dating and relationships and would just as soon tell you to eat cock off the floor as teach you anything about how they think and operate (not all of them, but many).  I do act as a filter of sorts.

I don't think I'm being hard, just fair.  Some of you say I don't offer solutions like the "experts," but that's because you probably wouldn't listen anyway.  If I told you the way to keep your man from cheating was to blow him whenever he asked, you wouldn't do it if you didn't feel like it-- so it'd be a moot point.  I give you better information-- "the game," as some men put it-- to help you make more informed decisions.

[Postscript: Despite being against soft landings, I know when to use a broadsword and when to use a scalpel.  If you have a question about men, dating, sex, and/or relationships, know that while the answer might be a hard pill I'll always try to make the swallowing as painless-- and funny-- as possible.]


  1. Adam I appreciate what you have to offer here in this blog. In this entry you say that to keep a man from cheating a woman should blow him when he ask, right? I love you candor, but you should discuss what men should do to keep there women, for instance learn more foreplay methods and put time into understanding her orgasms. To be fair, I think when you say that women should blow their men,discuss how men should suck the clit in the same breathe. I am not asking for a soft landing, I am merely asking for you to be more egalitarian!


  2. It's funny you mentioned that 'cause there's already a blog post on deck this week about that very subject.

    Get outta my head! LOL And thanks for reading. Tell everybody you know about New Shoes!